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The Men's Center of Los Angeles
Beverly Hills/Woodland Hills
in Association with
Sacred Path Productions
Newsletter for October 2006
Voicemail: (818) 348-9302
Web Site: www.menscenterlosangeles.com
Contact: info@menscenterlosangeles.com
Our Mission:
"Bringing good men together and bringing out the best in
them"
Our Approach:
Helping develop a greater sense of purpose and fulfillment for
men by fostering vision, passion, authenticity and intimate connection
to self and others
Our Services:
Psychotherapy for individuals, families, and groups, as well as
our Sacred Path and Call to Adventure Retreats,
Workshops, Seminars, and Monthly Men's Gatherings
RETREAT
JUST DAYS AWAY, SO MAN UP!!
October 19 - 22
New
Study on Prostate Cancer
IN THIS ISSUE:
A Message from the Director
Upcoming Events - Mark Your Calendar
- Fall Retreat October 19 through 22
- Ongoing Men's Groups
Nick Rath: One Man's Rant
John Mafrici: Jihad
New Study on Prostate Cancer
From the Daily Om: Generosity of Spirit
Recommended Reading: The Five Things We Cannot Change
Editorial: Mother Nature vs. Human Nature
Greywolf's Native Spirit Lodge In New Larger Quarters
Men's Teams
Important Web Links
CD's by Sacred Path Members Available
Sacred Path Alumni Yahoo Group
Contribute to the Newsletter
A Message from the Director -
Dr. Stephen Johnson
 October
4, 2006
Some Observations And Reflections
The first Sacred Path Men's retreat took place in Topanga Canyon
in 1987. There were approximately 30 men that participated in
a one-day workshop focusing on a number of topics of interest
to mostly midlife men during the final years of the 80's. I
held similar retreats about every 3 months. As the number of
men grew I began to expand the length of the event to two days,
and then three days, and eventually to the four-day retreat
that we have had in place for a number of years. We began holding
Call to Adventure Rites of Passage retreats in 2000. So, for
the past six years we have alternated a men's retreat in the
fall and a retreat for boys and men in the spring. Along the
way we changed venues, landing on Gindling Hilltop Camp, a refuge
that has been home to us since 1997.
Our largest retreats have drawn 85 to 120 men, and our average
has been 65 including staff. Some of the retreats, like the
one on the King, the one in 1997 to which we brought Robert
Bly and Martin Prechtal, and the CTA retreat in 2005, enrolled
quickly and were full to capacity. Most start off enrolling
slowly and build as we approach the retreat, usually with a
surge of sign-ups as we near the first day. The retreats have
never been real moneymakers, but the intent has not been as
much on creating a huge income vehicle as much as providing
an economical and productive opportunity for men to have a place
to find support and to encounter themselves in a safe environment.
Of course we do want the retreats to be profitable as well.
Many men have participated in the retreats for years and have
lost count of how many they have done. It's not uncommon for
a man who has participated in a dozen or more to proclaim that
each of his retreats was the best.
This upcoming retreat, just two weeks away, will undoubtedly
be one of the best as well. It appears that it may be a smaller
retreat since we have about 20 men enrolled at this point, not
including staff. It's possible that that number may double by
the time that we commence the retreat and it may not. Small
retreats are intimate; however, our larger retreats have been
intimate as well. I hear that there are men who are planning
to attend but just haven't signed up yet. After all, we reside
in Los Angeles where people hold out committing until the 11th
hour to keep their options open in case something better or
more pressing presents itself. I realize that we have to be
discriminating about where we invest our time and energies,
but it does place an added burden on retreat staff when there's
a lot to do to assist last minute enrollees the week of the
event. So, please consider getting your enrollment information
in now so that we can get you registered and mail your packets
to you.
There are men that will not attend this retreat for a variety
of reasons, including that they have other commitments, money
concerns, don't feel called to the mountain this time, etc.,
etc. We have always taken this in stride and have attempted
to make it possible for someone to attend without money being
a separating issue. I have always felt that as long as men wanted
to participate in the retreats, there would be a retreat scheduled
for them. It's the law of supply and demand. The men of my generation,
baby boomers, were the ones who spurred the men's movement into
existence in the late 80's. We were the peace and love generation
that participated in anti-war sit-ins, took up environmental
and ecological causes, supported the women's movement and felt
that we could make a difference in the world. We are older now
and must conserve our energies investing them wisely. We don't
have all the time in the world anymore and we wonder why our
best efforts didn't make the lasting difference that we thought
they would back then. The world seems to be unraveling rather
than coming together as we had hoped.
I have been reflecting about the hard and often tragic lessons
that come our way and ponder the question: What does the world
have to teach us? The message of the millennium will be that
consciousness is the dominant force in our lives, and we're
responsible for it, as well as for the manifestations of our
denial of consciousness. If something ceases to be of use, it
will be replaced by a paradigm that works. This is equally true
for each of us. We must make our personal evolution a microscopic
version of the macroscopic evolution of our planet.
Commanding our attention today is another scandal rocking
Washington, while a rash of school shootings over the past week
has assaulted us with the grim reality that the people that
are supposed to protect us and the places that are supposed
to be the safest are not. A stone has been thrown at the nest
of hornets and the Genie is out of the bottle and cannot be
put back in place. Since 9/11 our feelings of security in the
world at large and in our homeland have been dashed. There appears
to be more and more evidence that we are skating on thin ice
– forgive the veiled reference to global warming. And there
is a new generation of men who are now going through mid-life
challenges as many of us did 10 to 20 years ago. They need our
assistance and guidance.
It is certainly time for men to Man Up to the challenge of
being good men on the home front and in the world at large.
The Men's Center of Los Angeles and Sacred Path Men's Community
has been around for 20 years in service to men and mankind.
We will continue to make a difference in the world near and
far as long as we have the good men willing to step up and participate
in that endeavor. I invite you to participate in the celebration
of the culmination of a 20-year era of our men's community.
I encourage you to join us on the Mountain in two weeks. This
retreat will likely be the best!
Sincerely,
Stephen
To learn more about the Executive Director of the Los Angeles
Men's Center and Sacred Path Productions, go to: www.drstephenjohnson.com
Upcoming Events - Mark Your Calendar
Man Up for the
Challenge to be a Good Man
Join us for
the 19th Annual Fall Sacred Path Men's Retreat Thursday, October
19th through Sunday, October 22nd
"Men today face crisis, as romantic partners, fathers, sons,
workers, and friends. Uncertain of what it means to be a man
– especially a good man – and disconnected from
their needs, their truths, their values, and the spouses and
children they seek to love, many men are spiraling into desperation
and depression.
I know: I see these men every day in my therapeutic practice.
But even as I learned the peril men face, I have realized
how they can use the power inherent in manhood to step up
to the plate of their own lives – to "man up."
I have used my decades of experience as a psychotherapist
working with men in crisis, and developing communities of
good men, to explore the root causes of men's crises, to show
how and why they sabotage their relationships as lovers, fathers,
and good men in the world. It has been my endeavor to provide
them a hands-on blueprint for how they can meet the challenge
of manhood – by renewing their relationship to the women
they love, to their families, to the brotherhood of men, to
their vocations, and to their own sense of chivalry and goodness."
– Dr. Stephen J. Johnson
The community of men that will convene for this conference
will gather to explore what it means to be a good man. Ample
opportunities will be offered for men to explore their psyches
in large and small group formats. Workshops featuring a wide
range of experiential topics will provide men with forums
to engage themselves for the purpose of self-encounter and
self-development. There is nothing like being in the company
of good men to raise your consciousness and contact the depths
of your soul. We also wish to invite men, who are interested
in becoming mentors to boys in need, to join our Mentor Council.
We will be assisting men to comprehend what it takes to devote
one's attention to help boys grow up to become good men. Use
the Fall Retreat to be able to Man Up as Mentors and get ready
for our Spring Call to Adventure Rites of Passage Retreat.
If you're reading this article on the LAMC/Sacred Path web
site, take advantage of the early registration discounts by
going to Sacred Path page and printing out the complete retreat
flyer or click on the following link to print out the registration
form. Complete the form and either fax or mail it to reserve
your space for the fall retreat. Just click on: http://menscenterlosangeles.com/registration%20form.pdf
If you're reading the newsletter on PDF, just copy the link
to your address bar and download the form
Weekly Men's
Groups are available in Woodland Hills and Beverly
Hills. Both Stephen Johnson and Dan Franklin have room availiable
in their weekly therapeutic support groups held in Beverly
Hills and Woodland Hills. More information at: info@menscenterlosangeles.com
Nick Rath: One Man's Rant
Be warned. This is a rant. I have listened and read a lot
about this subject and it seems that either the people I've
listened to or read don't honestly think about what they say
or I'm missing something. The odds are good, I think, that
it is the second option. So, read on please and respond to
me so I can finally learn what so many are talking and writing
about.
 At
a gathering not long ago the dozen people assembled were asked
to voice their "Midsummer's Night Dream." A recurrent theme
was one of "peace". One voice spoke of peace in the Middle
East, another spoke of peace in the world. One person even
spoke of "a return to peace." Since it was a social gathering
I stayed quiet. This isn't a social gathering.
What are these people talking about? Peace? What is it? Is
it a condition on the planet of no war? When has that condition
ever existed? I can only think of one time and it didn't last.
In the short time between when God made Adam and when he made
Eve peace existed on Earth. Adam didn't fight with God. If
we believe the story in Genesis a short time after Adam and
Eve were created they disagreed (about how to follow their
directions from God). Was that a war? No, but it was not peace.
If I understand the concept of peace it isn't just that people,
ethnicities, communities, nations are not actively using violence
against each other, it is that they (those same people, ethnicities,
communities, nations) have no againstness for anyone.
In a course I took a long time ago a discussion was held
about the difference between a standard and an ideal. A standard
was defined as what behavior is expected. In school there
often is an expectation that assigned homework will be done
and returned on time. That is a standard. Ideally students
would do more that the assigned homework and master the subject.
We don't set that as a standard. It is an ideal.
Peace is an ideal. It hasn't happened, it probably won't
happen, but it is a worthy goal to aim at. Of the billions
of human societies (I count families as societies) on the
planet at any given moment , most of them are in conflict.
If there are three children, a Mom, and a Dad living in a
house somewhere and the youngest child is angry with Dad ,
peace is not in that family. Peace exists as a concept, an
ideal, to be sought after.
We can and do reward each other for successful approximation
of the ideal. When the three children have an afternoon where
they get along Mom makes dessert for dinner. Not as a reward
but as an expression of her affection.
They got closer to peace and they got that approximation
reinforced. Was it peace? No, but it was better than the week
where the couple were each angry and not speaking.
It wasn't peace because, at some level, one or more of the
people involved was not fully for the other person(s). There
is a good chance that each of the people in any interaction
are not even fully for themselves. I have spoken with people
who are at war with their weight, their body shape, their
sexuality, their financial condition. At war with. They actively
fight against those "extra" pounds, those hips, that nose,
that paunch. No peace there.
At the gathering someone spoke of their "Midsummer's Night
Dream" as the end of the insanity of people killing other
people. I almost laughed. The image of people killing each
other is repulsive. Wouldn't it be great of we had a month
where no one was killing anyone? That is an ideal. People
eat themselves to death. People help their children learn
how to eat themselves to death. People we know light a fire
next to their faces and inhale the smoke. They even pay for
the kindling for that fire. People go outside on the Fourth
of July and shoot guns in the air with no thought to the bullet
coming down and killing someone. People go to parties and
get drunk and then drive a four-thousand-pound car home. A
month without that insanity would certainly get us closer
to peace.
On the radio this morning I heard talk of "the peace process"
in the Middle East. When has there ever been peace in the
Middle East? Never in the existence of humanity. Are there
nations that are at peace with other nations? Is the United
States at peace with North Korea? How about with France? Or
China?
When we say we want peace I need to know what we are willing
to do to get it. In the conflict with Hammas peace is only
available after all Jews and Americans are dead. Are we willing
to die so they can have peace? I'm not. Can we have peace
if they don't die and we don't die? No. What behaviors are
available to us in the face of a stated and expressed intent
from the many groups like Hammas that can get us closer to
peace? When I find a group that has a plan for the successful
approximation of peace with people who want me dead I will
join that group and actively participate in their plan. As
of this moment I donŐt know of one group like that.
I work towards peace every day. My life is about peace.
I have neither the power nor wisdom to solve the problems
that exist between Israel and her neighbors or between the
Republican Party and the Democratic Party. I can and do help
families get closer to living together in peace. That's a
big deal to me. Not everyone can do what I do. However, I
believe that each person can decide that what they will aim
at is peace with each person in their lives.
We can treat the waitress that serves us in a way that expresses
our belief that she is of value and honor her for the contribution
she makes to the people she serves. We can make way for someone
in a hurry on the freeway. We can commit random acts of kindness
and joy as we live our lives. We can show our family that
we love them. We can tell the people in our lives that we
love them. We can listen when someone needs to be heard. We
can do all this, and more. It can be our ideal. I'm not different.
If I can strive toward these things, anyone can. If I am living
in joy I must have given up being against and have begun living
for. I can be at peace when I am there.
I'm not there most of the time. Successful approximation
is what I'm after. One more minute today, of living in joy
and giving that away, than yesterday. And, tomorrow one more
minute than today.
This rant has changed. It is now an invitation. Join me.
What we will give up is living every minute of our lives without
peace. What we will gain is joy and peace we have never known.
I make believe that this is contagious. I live as though that
is the truth. Imagine what this world can be like if I'm right.
– Nick Rath
The word jihad has become a common name since 9/11.
We can hardly go one day without hearing the word jihad.
Our local front page headline just today reads, "Al-Qaida
recruits 'nuclear' jihadists." It is disturbing to see that
we have now advanced to
the level of "nuclear jihadists." If surveyed, most would
describe the word jihad to mean "holy war" because
this is what we are often told it means and it is what we
witness in our present time of terrorism and violence between
warring peoples. The word jihad, however, did not originally
mean "holy war." The primary meaning of the word jihad
was "struggle."
In the religion of Islam, the word Islam itself is derived
from the Arabic root "Salema" which conveys the ideals of
peace, purity, surrender, submission and obedience. In this
context, Islam translates as "the perfect peace that comes
when one's life is surrendered to God." Muslims, therefore,
are men and women who have made an existential surrender of
their lives to Allah.
When the prophet Muhammad first received his revelations
in approximately the year 610, many Arabs had become convinced
that Allah was identical with the God of the Jews and Christians,
as their collective roots traced all the way back to Abraham.
Today however, some Muslims denigrate Judaism and Christianity,
and some extremists speak of the Muslim duty to conquer the
entire world for Islam, but these recent teachings break with
centuries of sacred tradition. Many of you read a recent e-mail
titled "Allah or Jesus" that mentioned a "holy jihad against
the infidels of the world." Likewise, in Judaism and Christianity,
some adherents also have extremist views of defeating the
Empire of Islam. But this extremism on both sides is not in
alignment with the examples of both Jesus and Muhammad.
Instead of bringing down legions of God's angels to overthrow
Rome, Jesus instead chose to ride into town on a donkey carrying
only the weapons of Truth and Compassion and later suffered
on a Cross. Likewise, the prophet Muhammad, at a time of war
and intense persecution from Mecca, led one thousand of his
devout Muslims who volunteered to travel 250 miles unarmed
to the hajj pilgrimage in the year 628 to Mecca. While leading
his people into what was obviously the lion's den of certain
destruction, Muhammad made his Muslims sit down in peaceful
demonstration, forcing the Meccans to negotiate for peace.
Two years later the Meccans voluntarily opened their gates
to Muhammad, who took the city without bloodshed. Islam is
now the second largest religion in the world next to Christianity.
The religions of the world and their teachings can be viewed
at two levels – with an exoteric (external) teaching
and an esoteric (internal) teaching. Religion has the potential
to truly serve humanity when the outer exoteric teaching in
the form of the written word or doctrine lead us to deeper
and more profound understanding and realizations that words
fall far short of describing. How adequately can you describe
in words what our Solar System looks like without catching
a glimpse, or describe feeling the warmth of the Sun without
the experience?
In similar fashion, the concept of jihad can also
have an external and internal significance applied to it.
We see the results of the external jihad all over the planet
in the form of world wide terrorism and the idea that "my
God is better than your God." Our history is full of wars
and crusades over religion.
I invite us, however, to consider the concept of the inner
jihad – an often distant territory largely unexplored.
To be still and go within is the uncharted territory we often
deny ourselves for various reasons. In this age of immediate
gratification, the idea of being with ourselves is easily
replaced by an infinite variety of distractions. Interestingly
enough, some of these distractions can take the form of the
troubles of the world we face daily. These troubles include
a continual endless stream of media headlines, the adrenaline
inducing "Fox Alerts," and threats of all sorts that tend
to keep many in a state of perpetual fear and anxiety. Even
if we were to somehow shut off the media spigot, there are
endless and infinite things to plug ourselves into and keep
us occupied from being still. And even if we "unplugged" from
every external distraction, we could still stay very busy
and occupied by our own thoughts and the "tapes" that play
in our mind. I invite us all to take a moment to name a few
of our favorite distractions and consider how they serve us.
Going within and being present with our thoughts, feelings
and emotions will often be uncomfortable and will feel like
a literal "struggle" or perhaps even a "holy war" within,
as we wrestle with ourselves, our past, our anger, our fear,
our desires, our hopes and dreams, our ego, our sense of separateness,
our God – our ability to let go and let God. And yet,
could it be possible that if we were to come to grips with
the "struggle" within us and arrive at Salema or that "perfect
peace" – how much would we really need to struggle with
those peoples, places and things in our external reality to
the point of violence and war? Now that we are in the age
of the nuclear jihadist, do we have the ability to turn our
weapons into plowshares? Would we be able to meet opposition
without weapons per the examples of Jesus and Muhammad? Would
it be necessary to go to war over religion, or anything for
that matter, if we all re-connected to the one God/Allah and
found that Kingdom Heaven within?
Namaste,
Brother John
New Study on Prostate Cancer
Treating Elderly Men Immediately After
Diagnosis is Better than the Current 'Watchful Waiting' Approach
It is better to treat prostate cancer in the elderly early
on rather than to wait and watch for signs of progression, as
is now commonly done, according to a new study that may change
the care for many patients with the disorder.
Surgery or radiation therapy in elderly men increases survival
by at least 30%, raising median survival times from 10 years
to more than 13 years, researchers reported Saturday at a prostate
symposium in San Francisco.
A team from Fox Chase Cancer Center in Philadelphia studied
Medicare records for 48,606 men age 65 to 80 who had survived
for a year after a prostate cancer diagnosis. All were diagnosed
between 1991 and 1999, with a median age of 72 at diagnosis.
A total of 19,948 men received radiation therapy, 14,098 underwent
surgery and the remaining 14,560 were simply observed. 27% of
the men in the watchful waiting group were still alive, with
a median survival time – the period in which half the patients
died – of 10 years. In contrast, 59% of those who received
either surgery or radiation therapy were still alive, with a
median survival time of 13 years and growing.
The benefit of treatment was apparent even among men who were
75 to 80 at the time of diagnosis. Radiation and surgery seemed
to be equally effective in all age groups.
Meanwhile, oncologists are eagerly awaiting results from a
variety of other prostate-cancer trials that are in progress.
Two trial, one conducted by the Department of Veterans affairs
and one in England, are randomly assigning men with prostate
cancer to treatment and watchful waiting groups. Because those
trials are prospective – that is, researchers are randomly
assigning patients into treatment/no-treatment groups rather
than looking at results in hindsight – the results are
expected to be definitive.
Another large trial being conducted by the National Cancer
Institute will determine whether yearly screening with a digital
rectal exam and a PSA blood test – used to detect a dysfunctional
prostate – will decrease prostate cancer deaths. Some scientists
have argued that it does not.
From the Daily Om: Generosity
of Spirit
Being Happy for Others
We all want to be the kind of people who are happy for others
when they experience success or a cause for celebration in
their lives, but it isn't always easy. Sometimes powerful,
dark feelings come up at times when decorum dictates that
we should be feeling the opposite. Instead of reaching out
and celebrating for our loved one, we may feel the rising
up of our own pain. This pain may arise because we feel jealous
of our friend for having something we don't have. It may arise
because our friend's success will lead to us losing them in
some way. And it may arise for reasons we don't yet understand.
The important thing is not to brush it under the rug, but
to take it seriously and look at it; suppressing it will only
make it worse. At the same time, we need to be sure to find
a way to congratulate our friends and celebrate their successes
as if they were our own.
The struggle with being happy for others presents itself
early in life. If a child wants a toy and another child has
it, the child will try to get it or will break down in tears.
Those primal feelings are still present in most of us, and
we have to acknowledge them when they arise. At the same time,
it is when we care enough for someone to let go of what we
want for ourselves that we grow as people. It can be a difficult
dance to find ourselves suspended between wanting the toy
and throwing a party for our friend who got the toy. Yet,
it is in throwing the party that we share in the joy-and,
to some extent, the toy-rather than cutting ourselves out
of it.
Extending ourselves to celebrate the happiness of others
requires a generosity of spirit that we sometimes find only
in the process of doing it. So when your best friend moves
to Spain with the person you had a crush on, tend to your
broken heart but throw them a going away party too.
Recommended Reading: The
Five Things We Cannot Change
Sacred Path members can send in their
own reviews and recommendations of personal favorites, whether
they be novels, poetry, short stories, or nonfiction dealing
with men's work, essays, anecdotes, sources of inspiration,
etc. Each review could include a short blurb on the author,
or perhaps a short piece taken from the work. Send your favorite
reads to Rich Manners at:
jyngleman@sbcglobal.net
The Five Things We Cannot Change...
and the Happiness We Find by Embracing Them
by David Richo
159 Pages
"Reinhold Niebuhr, an American Protestant
theologian, composed a prayer that has become the cornerstone
of the recovery movement: 'God grant me the serenity to
accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change
the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.'
This is a profound aspiration. But what are the things we
cannot change? Are they unique to each of us, or are there
some things athat all of us must acknowledge and accept
in order to find peace in our lives?"
-David Richo
In this provocative and inspiring book, David
Richo distills thirty years of exzperience as a therapist
to explain the underlying roots of unhappiness – and
the surprising secret to finding freedom and fulfillment.
There are certain facts of life that we cannot change –
the unavoidable "givens" of human existence. Richo
shows us that by dropping our deep-seated resistance to
these givens, we find liberation and discover the true gifts
that life has to offer us.
In the first part of the book, Richo identifies
and explores the five "givens" of life, and especially
of relationships:
1. Everything changes and ends.
2. Things do not always go according to plan.
3. Life is not always fair.
4. Pain is part of life.
5. People are not loving and loyal all the time.
Richo helps us to understand that we cannot
find real contentment in our lives until we acknowledge
and come to terms with these facts. Once we begin to do
that, we start to realize that these givens actually offer
us profound opportunities. With warmth and poetic flair,
Richo invites us to bring new honesty and realism to bear
in our lives so that we can find lasting happiness.
In part two, the author explains how we can
cultivate an "unconditional yes" to these conditions
of existence, how we can learn to open, accept, even embrace
our lives under any circumstances. Blending Western psychology
and Eastern spirituality, and including practical exercises,
Richo shows us how to open up to our lives – including
to what is frightening, painful, or disappointing –
and discover our greatest gifts.
Editorial: Mother Nature
vs. Human Nature
What responsibility, if any, does being a human entail?
Are we in truth stewards of the planet, watching out for
those creatures  not
as intelligent and adaptable as we, or do we simply exist
for our own pleasure, our own power, our own greed? Do we
find a way to live together in peace and make the world
a better place, or do we mindlessly destroy ourselves and
everything else on this planet in our quest to show that
we're better (substitute our God's the only right one, our
skin color's prettier, our dick's longer, we're richer.
etc. etc.) than the next guys'? These questions seem to
have a greater and greater importance as we begin to see
what we have already done to the planet during our brief
stay here as a species.
The first dwellers upon this land lived hand in hand with
nature, showing respect and reverence for those animals
and plants that they had to kill in order to live. They
gave up prayers of thanks to the Great Spirit for creating
the game and growing things that provided sustenance to
their communities. They truly lived in stewardship of the
land, using only that which they needed. They lived consciously,
aware of the sights, smells, and sounds that constantly
spoke to their senses, intertwined with each other and with
nature.
Fast forward to today, where wholesale destruction of the
environment and living beings (including countless humans)
goes hidden by oil-hungry politicians and mega-corporations,
where global warming threatens the entire planet, where
greed and ego demand more and more wealth and power going
to fewer and fewer individuals. It seems to me that this
'me, me, me' epidemic is reaching a point of no return.
People no longer live consciously, aware of what they are
doing to the world around them. They live totally separated
from their neighbors and communities, building walls around
their palatial properties. Most homes built today have no
porches on which to sit and talk, few sidewalks to reach
the home of the family next door. The motto seems to be,
"As long as I get mine, that's all that matters".
Which brings me to a personal example that troubles me
greatly.
This month, I wrote a report on David Richo's book, "Five
Things We Cannot Change," in which I talk about embracing
those happenings over which we have no control, like life
not always being fair, things not going according to plan,
people not always being loving or kind. The next day I found
a letter in my mailbox from a person 2-1/2 blocks up the
hill and across the street, demanding that I cut down five
beautiful pine trees on my property because they spoil his
"view". And I must tell you that I'm having a
lot of trouble embracing the destruction of nature on account
of someone's thoughtless ego trip.
My wife Mimi and I are blessed to live in the hills at
the south end of Woodland Hills amongst lush landscapes
and lovely homes. We are also cursed because the home we
bought belongs to a "homeowner's association".
What does this mean? It means that if one of the homeowners
living higher up on the hill gets a whim that someone's
trees lower on the hill are blocking his or her "view",
the unfortunate individuals below have no choice but to
cut their trees down. It matters not that these trees might
be 40 years old, or 70 feet high, or were here on the planet
long before the complaining homeowner was born and would
probably still be here after his/her death. It matters not
that these trees themselves contribute to the beautiful
view, affording homes for countless animals and birds, binding
the earth together with their roots, absorbing carbon dioxide
and breathing out oxygen.
What matters is that some individual decides one day that
he/she can't see the buildings in the valley from his/her
front porch, and his/her ego demands that those trees be
removed immediately. This individual stuffs a letter into
the mailboxes of several families living down the hill referring
to the rules and regulations of the association. The homeowners
lower down have no recourse. They must cut down their trees
at their own expense to satisfy the ego of the complainant.
Aside from all the havoc that the removal of these trees
will cause in the environment, the worst part of the process
is that the person who caused the uproar will look at the
"view" for five minutes and then forget about
it entirely, moving on to the next thing he or she must
have to make them feel important, powerful, and rich.
Many municipalities and communities through our country
have laws protecting trees and wildlife, requiring citizens
to make applications showing cause before cutting down any
greenery. In many cases, people are forbidden to remove
natural objects. But in the growing atmosphere of conspicuous
consumption, governmental waste and spoilage of natural
resources, and just plain human greed and ego, these safeguards
are being consistently eroded. And now we see in this case
the law actually standing up for those who wish to destroy
the environment to satisfy their whims. State government
will not move to stop them. City government will do nothing.
Individuals who try to stand against the ruling can be sued
and have liens placed against their homes. We can only stand
by and pay for our trees to be destroyed.
I am outraged and saddened by the direction events like
the above are taking our society. Those who make no attempt
to live consciously are losing the ability for empathy,
for caring about anyone or anything beyond their grasp.
Those who have no reverence or a sense of stewardship for
nature have no thought for cutting down living trees or
destroying countless habitats.
What hope, if any, do I have for humanity?
All I can say is that I am grateful for the existence of
my brothers who read this newsletter, who cherish nature
and life and who go up on the mountain to once again renew
our relationship with each other and with all the gifts
that the Great Spirit has given us in order to take them
down into the world.
In brotherhood,
Rich Manners
Greywolf's Native Spirit Lodge
in New Larger Quarters
The Native Spirit Lodge has moved to a facility
2 1/2 times larger than the old store. It is now located at
22559 Ventura Boulevard in Woodland Hills, two blocks west
of Shoup on the north side of the street. Greywolf and David
have augmented their stocks of stones, crystals, carved turquoise,
necklaces, bracelets, and Native American goods including
pipes, talking sticks, drums, rattles, various smudges and
more. They also have a complete supply of Tibetan Singing
Bowls. Hours are Wednesday through Sunday, 12-6 PM. The phone
number is still (818) 703-7046. Remember to ask for the Sacred
Path discount price when you purchase your goods.
A new group will be forming in the Venice/Pacific Palisades
area. For more info on joining and meeting times, contact Nick
Rath at (310) 454-2965, or e-mail him at: nrath@adelphia.net
The West Hills Group is now filled to
capacity. For those interested in adding their names to the
wait list, contact Mitch Cohen at (818) 631-4175, or e-mail
him at freehand@earthlink.net
The West Side Men's Group meets every first Thursday of the
month in addition to our required monthly gathering on the third
Thursday of the month. In October, the West Side Men's Gathering
will get together again on Thursday,October 5th as well as Thursday,
the 19th, location to be determined. For more information or
to join the group, call Mark Kreher at (310)581-6616 or e-mail
him at: mark.kreher@verizon.net.
You can also contact David Sacks at (323) 650-8239, or e-mail
him at: dasacks@yahoo.com,
The Thousand Oaks/Calabasas Men's Circle is currently meeting
monthly. If you live near this geographic area and have an interest
in participating in a men's group, contact Matthew at (818)774-1000,
or e-mail him at: matthewburke@singerburke.com
for more information.
David "Stongbear" Myers is heading up a team in the
San Gabriel Valley. If you're interested in joining, talk to
Strongbear at (818)541-9499, or e-mail him at: dj0814myers@earthlink.net.
Important Web Links
The LAMC web site now has a page dedicated to links to various
individuals and organizations who may be of assistance to members.
You'll find therapists, counselors, authors, realtors, health
resources, men's issues resources, assistance in fathering,
musicians, Native American and interfaith teachings, ceremonies
and camps,midlife issues resources, and a lot more. If you're
reading the newsletter on a PDF file, simply paste this link
into your web browser to go to the Links page: www.menscenterlosangeles.com/links.html
CD's by Sacred Path Members Available
You can purchase the excellent CD's by Sacred Path brothers
Ed Munter, Tommy Holmes, Christo Pellani, Rich Manners
and Albert Marrewa.
Ed's CD's, Tracking Down the Soul and Soul Journey,
are available at www.innerpathproductions.org
Tommy's self-titled album can be ordered from www.TommyHolmes.com.
Christo's second album, Soundscape Pyramids – Resonance
Forms, is available at info@soundformation.com
Rich's CD, Speechless, featuring the voices of Mimi
Manners, is available at jyngleman@sbcglobal.net
Albert's Relaxing Into Now is available at www.albertmarrewa.com
In addition, talks by the Director of the L.A. Men's Center,
Dr. Stephen Johnson, are available on the LA Men's Center web
site, as well as several CD sets of past retreats. Go to
www.menscenterlosangeles.com
Sacred Path Alumni Yahoo Group
What does Sacred Path do to support men after they have completed
their retreats? The Sacred Path Alumni Discussion Group is one
answer to that query. It provides a means for our community
of men to have ongoing e-mail contact and discussions with their
fellow Sacred Path Retreat graduates. Membership is restricted
to graduates of a Sacred Path retreat. The simplest way to sign
up is to send an e-mail (its content is irrelevant) to: Sacred_Path_Alumni-subscribe@Yahoo.groups.com.
You can also join from the Sacred Path Alumni's home page:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/sacredpathalumni.
Once you have become a member of the discussion group, you
can begin using our Sacred Path Alumni Yahoo Group immediately.
Members are able to use any or all of the following features:
Contribute to the Newsletter
Does your creativity need an outlet? Here's a chance for your
unique words to appear on the printed page (or at least a computer
screen)! Send us an article, an anecdote, a poem, a joke; whatever
tickles your fancy. Please address your e-mails to Rich Manners
at: jyngleman@sbcglobal.net.
Bribes will be cheerfully accepted!
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